I tend to disappear off the face of the Earth from time to time, which may or may not cause some people to wonder. To those who have noticed my absence, I can only offer my humblest apologies, but without empty promises to do better in the future, for I often wonder if I am truly serving the best interests of my fellow man in this role of intrepid commentator/chronicler/crackpot.

In these days when there are plenty of people gloomily lamenting — or gleefully documenting — the downfall of the Bush administration, I feel that my voice would only contribute more static and noise to the eardrum-shattering, mind-numbing cacophony of frustration, despair and uncertainty (with some most inappropriate sounds of joy and celebration cutting into the mix) that has become our national conversation.

Being an eternal optimist and ardent believer in the power of positive thinking, I am hopeful noting that the tragic failure of leadership we have suffered has been causing partisanship to be set aside in favor of pragmatism — although some poor, disillusioned folks will never be able to stop.

And now, for those of you who have endured my self-indulgence to this point in the text, I present a special bonus “rant” (something my prim and proper thought processes hardly ever produce) for your possible reading pleasure — or pain.

Partisanship

Partisanship is the elevation of party over principle to the detriment of both. This toxic by-product of vanity and greed fueled by laziness and apathy is the source of much of the unnecessary strife that seems to have divided our nation into two camps: the red partisans and the blue partisans.

In this pernicious uncivil war of ideologues who don’t really offer us anything but protection from the responsibility of thinking for ourselves, vainglorious authoritarians who think they know what’s best for everyone else froth at the mouth, shouting out rude names, while flinging their feces at one another.

The blue partisans sometimes call the red partisans, “nutjobs,” and the red partisans, not to be outdone, sometimes call the blue partisans “moonbats,” which is fitting as the red partisans and the blue partisans both appear to be free of the burdens of independent thought and the ability to reason.

Words are weapons in this power struggle between the blue and the red, and each side uses them to disparage and denigrate the other whenever the opportunity to do so presents itself.

Each side is has its own arsenal of “talking points” and other varieties of featherbrained and transparently propagandistic drivel, which both incessantly parrot and spew before thinking people who cannot help laughing bitterly while trying not to gag on the deliberate obtuseness and blatant intellectual dishonesty.

The red partisans and the blue partisans each have differing ideas about what’s best for America’s future and how Americans should behave and think, and they are presently deadlocked in a ridiculous popularity contest that purports to be settling that dilemma — but let’s not hold our breath because a nation divided against itself is most advantageous to the fund raising efforts of both red and blue partisans — once and for all.

Meanwhile, those of us who are standing somewhere in the middle of all that nastiness and noise keep wishing and hoping for some metaphorical umbrella and a scorecard with which to keep track of the contrived rants, preposterous assertions and unrestrained spin being proffered as truth.